Back in 1912, Edgar Rice Burroughs created John Carter, who appears in the Barsoom novels. Carter ends up on Mars, hence the movie was originally entitle John Carter of Mars. And it’s the red planet which see’s Carter do most of his..um…doing. 100 hundred years ago, this notion of a man travelling to a distant planet most have blown peoples minds. So, 100 hundred years on and with Andrew Stanton (Pixar fame) planted in the directors chair, how does the movie shape up?
John Carter arrives in cinemas amidst a huge amount of hype and drama. Much has been made of the title change and even more has been made about the cost of the movie, which is apparently around the $235 million. Obviously brining a 100 year comic book into the present day, and with a martian setting, isn’t going to be cheap. So, is John Carter worth all the hype and money?
Simply put, NO! Carter (Taylor Kitsch) a seasoned Civil War veteran, finds himself on Mars after a spot of teleportation in the old West. Inhabited by 12 foot tall warriors, Carter finds himself not only with a few extra super human powers (like leaping in giant bounds) but as a prisoner of the said alien warriors. In between escaping he finds a princess who is in desperate need of a savior, not to mention some ongoing local warfare.
Thats more or less the story, although audiences will struggle to get a handle on it. The plot is extremely convoluted and complicated, not to mention bursting at the seams with laborious amounts of dialogue. And while the story in theory is simple, the presentation will leave you confused, bored and tired. On the occasion where the giant action set pieces take place, you do wake up and marvel at some fantastic action. One scene in particular sees Carter take on more or less an entire army, with bodies flying through the air in a blue bloody mess. It really is a spectacular scene, and possibly the only memorable scene in the movie. Other action set pieces work well too, with the white monkey battle proving quite entertaining.

Evolution on Mars is as you would expect..almost. Ships fly using advanced gravity engines, yet their weapons are primitive with their roots firmly planted in swashbuckling land. And while I’m sure the movie remains very loyal to its source material, this is also one of its bigger problems. As much as Sci-Fi movies are unbelievable, you rarely question whats on screen. Old fashioned Swords and spaceships (which are quite primitive in places) on the other hand, simply don’t mix and just add to the reasons you’ll find fault with this movie. Look, its not all bad. The action scenes (when they do happen)as mentioned are decent enough, but everything else…well it just tries to cram so much in. At times its Gladiator, other times its Avatar and most of the time it’s not quite sure what it is. And this is where you will spend most of your time questioning everything that unfolds in front of you.
Andrew Stanton comes from good stock, as they say. Having directed Wall-E and Finding Nemo it’s hard to fathom where all of this went wrong. The guy is an incredible talent and seems to have a relentless work ethic. But John Carter comes across as incredibly self indulgent. That said, the attention to detail throughout the movie is quite staggering. Not only the the aliens have a quite unique look to them, they have all individual personalities. Mars itself looks quite vast and impressive and to his credit Stanton has left no martian stone unturned, but being brutally honest about it, it doesn’t matter.
Not even a lovable bullfrog alien mutt can save this in any grace. And while the cast including Taylor Kitsch, Samantha Morton and a very sexy Lynn Collins are adequate at what they do, its the movie that surrounds them, lets them down. In particular some of the green screen scenes like so blatantly obvious, its like someone give up or couldn’t be bothered. It is a struggle to find a huge amount of positives about the movie and when you do find one, its quickly diminished.
As for the 3D? Well, its another post conversion job, and while it’s not entirely bad, it does nothing to add to the movie, and having 3D glasses hanging on your nose for 132 minutes is no mean feat.
This is going to be a very tough sell on audiences. John Carter is incredibly disappointing, overlong and too complicated for its own good, which will bring you nothing but confusion and bewilderment. On the positive side, if you do fancy a movie that has a powerful ability to induce sleep, then..sadly this is it!

John Carter arrives in cinemas amidst a huge amount of hype and drama. Much has been made of the title change and even more has been made about the cost of the movie, which is apparently around the $235 million. Obviously brining a 100 year comic book into the present day, and with a martian setting, isn’t going to be cheap. So, is John Carter worth all the hype and money?
Simply put, NO! Carter (Taylor Kitsch) a seasoned Civil War veteran, finds himself on Mars after a spot of teleportation in the old West. Inhabited by 12 foot tall warriors, Carter finds himself not only with a few extra super human powers (like leaping in giant bounds) but as a prisoner of the said alien warriors. In between escaping he finds a princess who is in desperate need of a savior, not to mention some ongoing local warfare.
Thats more or less the story, although audiences will struggle to get a handle on it. The plot is extremely convoluted and complicated, not to mention bursting at the seams with laborious amounts of dialogue. And while the story in theory is simple, the presentation will leave you confused, bored and tired. On the occasion where the giant action set pieces take place, you do wake up and marvel at some fantastic action. One scene in particular sees Carter take on more or less an entire army, with bodies flying through the air in a blue bloody mess. It really is a spectacular scene, and possibly the only memorable scene in the movie. Other action set pieces work well too, with the white monkey battle proving quite entertaining.
Evolution on Mars is as you would expect..almost. Ships fly using advanced gravity engines, yet their weapons are primitive with their roots firmly planted in swashbuckling land. And while I’m sure the movie remains very loyal to its source material, this is also one of its bigger problems. As much as Sci-Fi movies are unbelievable, you rarely question whats on screen. Old fashioned Swords and spaceships (which are quite primitive in places) on the other hand, simply don’t mix and just add to the reasons you’ll find fault with this movie. Look, its not all bad. The action scenes (when they do happen)as mentioned are decent enough, but everything else…well it just tries to cram so much in. At times its Gladiator, other times its Avatar and most of the time it’s not quite sure what it is. And this is where you will spend most of your time questioning everything that unfolds in front of you.
Andrew Stanton comes from good stock, as they say. Having directed Wall-E and Finding Nemo it’s hard to fathom where all of this went wrong. The guy is an incredible talent and seems to have a relentless work ethic. But John Carter comes across as incredibly self indulgent. That said, the attention to detail throughout the movie is quite staggering. Not only the the aliens have a quite unique look to them, they have all individual personalities. Mars itself looks quite vast and impressive and to his credit Stanton has left no martian stone unturned, but being brutally honest about it, it doesn’t matter.
Not even a lovable bullfrog alien mutt can save this in any grace. And while the cast including Taylor Kitsch, Samantha Morton and a very sexy Lynn Collins are adequate at what they do, its the movie that surrounds them, lets them down. In particular some of the green screen scenes like so blatantly obvious, its like someone give up or couldn’t be bothered. It is a struggle to find a huge amount of positives about the movie and when you do find one, its quickly diminished.
As for the 3D? Well, its another post conversion job, and while it’s not entirely bad, it does nothing to add to the movie, and having 3D glasses hanging on your nose for 132 minutes is no mean feat.
This is going to be a very tough sell on audiences. John Carter is incredibly disappointing, overlong and too complicated for its own good, which will bring you nothing but confusion and bewilderment. On the positive side, if you do fancy a movie that has a powerful ability to induce sleep, then..sadly this is it!